The first issue of Cosmic Ghost Rider Destroys Marvel History ended with an intriguing cliffhanger (stop reading now if you’re spoiler-averse for last month’s comic): Uatu the Watcher arriving in the past with a dramatic entrance to caution the Cosmic Ghost Rider (a future version of Frank Castle who is both a Spirit of Vengeance and a wielder of the Power Cosmic) not to save his own family from their impending murder. For some reason, this week’s issue #2 does not follow up on that cliffhanger in any way, shape, or form. This lack of consequence is a microcosm of this issue, and perhaps even the series as a whole.

Where the first issue focused on Frank (pretending to be his own Uncle Fredo) telling his wife and son tall tales while waiting to avert their tragic demise, inserting himself into the history of the Fantastic Four, this issue repeats the formula with the history of Spider-Man. Like the first issue, the issue lacks stakes and permanence, since the reader is aware that (a) Frank is lying and these stories never happened, and (b) Frank won’t end up stopping his family’s murder because Marvel won’t erase the Punisher from continuity.

In the hands of creator Donny Cates, who has written almost all of Cosmic Ghost Rider’s appearances, from his debut in 2017’s Thanos series through his current affiliation as part of the Guardians of the Galaxy lineup, this alternate Frank Castle is a delightfully irreverent, funny-but-scary, slightly insane screwball. Unfortunately, Cosmic Ghost Rider Destroys Marvel History is not written by Donny Cates, but by Paul Scheer and Nick Giovannetti, and in their hands Cosmic Ghost Rider comes off as a poor man’s Deadpool. The jokes are tired (and, in this issue anyway, fueled by some distasteful gay panic humor), the character is boring, and the story has no stakes.

The book fares better in the art department. It’s always a pleasure to see Todd Nauck return to superhero comics, and his Spider-Man is a delight. Antonio Fabela and VC’s Travis Lanham, handling color art and lettering respectively, give this book the polished sheen that is expected of a Marvel comic. It’s a professionally constructed book with quality art.

That professionalism, unfortunately, doesn’t save what is ultimately a meaningless exercise. At the end of the day, this book doesn’t so much destroy Marvel history as it does dilute the Marvel brand. If you’re jonesing for the adventures of Cosmic Ghost Rider, skip this one and check out the current run of Guardians of the Galaxy instead.

Grade: C